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How to Have “The Talk” with your Partner(s)

Promoting Healthy Relationships and Setting Boundaries

As college students, we are all still learning how to navigate our sexual health. It's important to understand how broad the topic of sexual health is. It includes your sexuality, sexual preferences, wants and needs, etc. Having a solid understanding of sexual health and knowing your own boundaries and how to communicate them is crucial when engaging in new relationships. This can be key in understanding yourself and establishing healthy relationships and a mutual understanding with your partner(s).

For many, sex is a taboo topic of conversation. Because of this, it can feel pretty awkward to talk about your sexual health with someone else, especially when entering a new relationship. Having the conversation doesn't have to feel awkward. In fact, talking about sex can benefit the relationship and your experiences long term. Sex can affect you in ways that aren't just physical. This is why it is very important to have conversations about sex before actually engaging.

Still feeling nervous? Here are a number of ways you can approach the conversation. 

You can: 
  • Ask your partner to define sexual health, what does it look like for them? This is a good icebreaker and can make them feel more comfortable
  • Let your partner know that it's important for you to discuss your sexual health and history. Then you can ask your partner when they last got tested and if you could both get tested before you get intimate
  • Talk about your attitudes towards sex in order to get on the same page. "What are we each comfortable doing?" "Let's talk about personal boundaries"
  • Reassure them that you're coming from a well-meaning and positive place.

It is important to know that even if you use any of these approaches, there's no guarantee that your partner will be receptive to having a conversation about their sexual health. If this does happen, you should consider whether or not it's worth moving forward in the relationship. The point of having these conversations about sexual health is to make sure both you and your partner feel safe and comfortable with one another. If they refuse to have that discussion, the relationship might not be worth pursuing. Remember to keep your needs in mind as you navigate these conversations and figure out your compatibility!

Know that if you ever need help navigating how to talk to your partner about sexual health, UMBC offers an array of resources such as the Office of Health Promotion (OHP) and Retriever Integrated Health (RIH). They are both located in The Center for Well-Being and can help you and/or your partner. To check out their services, head over to https://healthpromotion.umbc.edu/ and https://health.umbc.edu

We are sharing tips on healthy relationships and safe sex practices on Instagram and Twitter! Follow us @UMBCOHP to learn more.

Written by peer health educators Anna Green ('23), Biological Sciences; Meghan Thomas ('24), Biochemistry and Molecular Biology; Nia Hopkins ('24), Psychology

Interested in becoming a Peer Health Educator? Applications are open. Learn more by visiting, https://healthpromotion.umbc.edu/peer-health-educators/

Posted: April 12, 2023, 11:19 AM